Here at nothinbutsport, we don't pansy arse around. If we are going to test a beer we test it properly. No analyzing the flavors, just the stuff you really want to know like: Will this get me laid, will this make me bloated and tired or energetic and randy.  So here is the rundown

Based on taste this is the best beer I've had so far.

Aftrer 1: OMG this is an awesome beer, Clean tasting.

After 2. Still tastes good,  Had some chocolate and then more beer- the taste was still great! Amazing!!

After 5. Bloat-age. feel like I've had 12 already based on bloat.

After 7: Beer buzz finally Starting to kick in. Bloat gone, musty have been the beans I had for breaky. Very energetic, went out and kicked the piss out of my punching bag.

After 9, Still kicking the bag, Have missed a few times and landed on my arse, but so drunk it didn't hurt.

After 11. Fucked, not the drunk type (though very drunk)I wore my self out, I was going to take a muff diving trip, but now I can hardly move, sorry lady Beaver.

After13. No vomit, but I haven't moved in an hour. What the fuck was I thinking, I thought I was Anderson Silva, when in actual fact I'm more like  an Albino Aretha Franklin. Bad for me.


Morning after, Fuck me! No hangover but I feel like I have been in a fight with a bulldozer. My Legs are Bruised to shit and I think I have pulled a hammy, possible bruised tailbone and for some unknown reason my shoulder feel like I've been tackling brick walls. (possible Lady Beaver revenge attack?!) Other than that...I'm all good.


Lunchtime after.: Everyone clear out! Things just got stinky. WOW my AGB (after Grog Bog) smells like a rat crawled up my arse and died,. that might explain the sore tailbone and the smell.

Evening after: Feeling a little less sore, cracking another Cuba '59 because they taste so fucking great!   Aside from my own stupidity, I had no hangover and any beer that goes with Chocolate, is a winner!

Overall I'm giving this 5 Drunken Hoffs!

Sol' Its a nice mexican beer, Carona style, but cheaper. Which, after the expenses of moving house, I needed a cheap one.

After1: Nice. Not one of those "moreish" beers, but not one that makes you want to immendiatly switch to spirits.

After 3: Starting to warmup. Got the Cuban druglord white suit on and getting ready to party like one.

After 5: A little tipsy but feel like I need a "bumper" to speed up my drunkeness. - Had a Jäger bomb. Lets get this shit going

After 8:  Feeling great now - Have some weird fascination with UFC and Anderson "The Spider" Silva, beating the shit out of people. Another Jäger bomb to keep things flowing. Reminding everyone that "Stevie Wonder is a musical genius, motherfucker!" in my best Eddie Murphy voice.

After 10: Well I'm feeling great. But most of the "crew" are Rancid. Forced another Bomb on crew and a beer chaser......big mistake..... I'm flying and talking shit - its all a blur, but I have to take a piss outside as the crew is using every toilet, and sink in the house to chunder...pussies. Cant work out why there is so many Mexicans in the world, because  I'm hardly interested in porking .... I just wanna talk shit!


After 12: being forced to call it a night. I'm probably a few off being totally legless, but nevertheless, quite drunk and jovial.... The Crew has passed out on my floor.


Morning after: Fuck me I'm still drink. Room spinning, cant stomach the idea of food.....not good. Evil shit.


Afternoon after: Feeling better, a little tired, but still seedy.  Wikid nasty hangover.

rating: Having to level up with a few Jäger bombs defiantly counts against Sol. As does the wikid hangover. A good time was had though, so it wasn't all bad. In the end it was average.

Two Drunken Hoffs.

After 1: The taste is not too bad, a little bitter, me likes.

After 4: Feeling very jovial. Have a good time laughing and joking. Have started cranking parody songs.
 

After 6: still on the parody songs, but laughing hysterically. have moved onto the upper class version of parody songs.....Weird Al.


After 8: Late night trip to KFC. I fucken LOVE fillet burgers. They go great with this beer.

After 9.  Wow I'm maggot, but belly is feeling good. no issues with the bladder either. I seem to have lost my pants somewhere though.


After 11. Crisis averted, pants found...not sure what is spilled on them, but since my drawer seems to have a drunk proof handle I'll have to make do with these ones,

After 13.... dwunk dwunk dwunk. Lady Beaver is giving me the wink. These beers don't stink so i can "hook in" with out being told to fuck off and shower, ALL KINDs OF WIN! ok business taken care of. 4am, time for sleep, people coming over later on.


the next morning: No hangover,What a glorious beer. up after just 4 hours of sleep. Why do people ring so early on a Saturday? Oh and a random thought...How many times do you think you have called someone and they were in the middle of sex?  More often than you'd think...specially if your calling the Beaver Mansion. More types of WIN!

Great Beer. Great night. And with the 20% off sale at my local grogger, it was the cheapest yet.
Cheap, not stinky, no hangover, pulled a root (or 2 *winks* ), yep this one is getting 5 drunken Hoffs!

 Ok now for starters this stuff was cheap, and that is always a good start. Here is the beer by Beer analysis.

After 1 Oranjeboom:  taste is decent.  For the price its a pleasant surprise.

After 4  Oranjeboom :  the constant pissing has started. Cant get through a single beer without needing another slash.
Also reminiscing about Great sportsman, and having deep and meaningful's with anyone who will listen.

6 Oranjeboom : - Bloatage and some signs of slowing. Feeling randy, but lethargic and not terribly motivated to "put the moves on".

10 Oranjeboom : cant type very fast and fuck me if i am trying anything to get a root. I'm rubbing feet, putting on candles, and Kenny G is playing in the background. Problem is, this stinky fucking beer is making it difficult to get close enough to put any moves on. Will crack #11 and see if it helps and  I can pull a root after it ;)

After 11 Oranjeboom: Feeling way more smashed than I should after only a dozen. So these bitches have a chemical kick or some bastard has spiked my drinks.

12 down and I'm done. All over the place cant sit strait and going to bed.  Sent the crew home. I haven't had my Technicolor Yawn yet, but feel it is imminant.

The Day after 12 Oranjeboom: SEEEEEDY. Bloody bad hangover, cant stomach any food, and cant face the sunshine. Going to sit in a dark room and feel sorry for myself.

The arvo after 12 Oranjeboom: Still seedy, thinking a "hair of dog" might be in order, but cant stomach the thought of another Oranjeboom  I think that's why it was only $35 a carton.


This beer gets 2 and a half Drunken Hoffs.

After 1 : Löwenbräu - smooth, refreshing, great!

After 2: Löwenbräu  - refreshing, but not enough. Once you have teh second its nigh on impossible to stop

After 6 :  - feeling rather great- taste is awesome and unlike other beers your feeling energetic! Never drink it at a Karaoke bar - you will definatly end up singing something like the Maccarana..with actions DONT DO IT!!!

After 9:  Löwenbräu's - you're likely out the front kicking a footy, and climbing trees to retrieve said footy. You dont even care that its raining! Still feeling great!

After 14:  Löwenbräu's-  oh dear, its time to send the mates home cos Mrs Beaver is going to get "it". Something  happens between 13 and 14 that awakens the 'urges' within your jeans.


The morning after 14 Löwenbräu's:  feeling fine. No hangover to speak of, a little sore downstairs, probably from kicking the footy without warming up properly. All is fine - could easily drink more that night.

The afternoon after 14 Löwenbräu's :  lookout Bogger, you are in for a very bad time. The only drawback of Löwenbräu is the A.G.B or the "After Grog Bog". Yikes!

All in all, I give this Beer 4 and a half  Drunken Hoffs!

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